The Chase is over

US College Star QB Chase Clement Quits TiCats Rookie Camp after 1 Day

The Hamilton media is reporting that former Rice QB Chase Clement has quit the Hamilton Tiger-Cats rookie camp to pursue “business interests”. It seems like it was just yesterday that the CFL team announced his signing – well, actually it was three days ago.

The player came accompanied by a big reputation, as promoted on websites like examiner.com:

This analyst expects Clement to surprise a few people! However, one of the first things to which Clement will have to become accustomed is how the Canadians spell offense and defense…they spell them…offence and defence!&^*(&*(!

 Well, he sure surprised everyone – even though he didn’t last long enough to learn the local etymology.

The question remains, however, as to what these urgent “business interests” actually were. Here are our top ten alleged possibilities:

10. A position opened up with Casey Printers’ agency for motivational speakers.

9. Just one word: Plastics.

8. He wanted to invest in that General Motors everyone keeps talking about.

7. Just three words: Texas Style Poutine.

6. Who needs football when you can get 200% interest from Madoff and Associates?

5. Shamwow needed a celebrity endorser.

4. “Would you like fries with that sir?”

3. The next big thing: Polaroid. “The photos develop all by themselves.”

2. If you have a problem, if no one else can help, and if you can find them, maybe you can hire… The A-Team.

1. The bankruptcy proceedings of the NHL Coyotes presents a unique opportunity to bring pro-hockey back to Arizona.